When I was 7, I dreamt of a world where a girl could easily disguise her appetite for rats. (See image below.)
Now I know better.
Now I know that simply starting to eat bananas when people walk in won't cut it. If you really want to hide your rat-eating habit, you have to break off big chunks of banana and get rid of them ASAP. It has to look like a lot of the banana is missing, OK? Like you've been eating that banana for awhile. Or your neighbor's mom will just come in, see that some rats are missing, see the blood and see the bananas that you've BARELY touched and know exactly what you've done.
LISTEN, if that banana isn't legit noshed into, you can kiss that sweet 2nd (3rd?) grade reputation for being a pretty decent human goodbye. People will question everything. Especially neighbor's moms. (Neighbor's moms question everything all the time, and now their rats are missing?)
It's simple: If you wanna eat rats, but not have people know that you ate them, you have to tell a story. A good one. No barely eaten bananas. Which is why I became a copywriter! I love bananas, and by 'bananas,' I mean stories. I prefer to tell true stories because it's easier to sleep at night and I am happy to help brands find those truths. I used to spin bananas as a copywriter / ACD in San Francisco. Now I'm doing it in Portland. If I know you, and I think I don't, this has sold you on wanting to work with me - so head straight to my contact info here.
Now I know better.
Now I know that simply starting to eat bananas when people walk in won't cut it. If you really want to hide your rat-eating habit, you have to break off big chunks of banana and get rid of them ASAP. It has to look like a lot of the banana is missing, OK? Like you've been eating that banana for awhile. Or your neighbor's mom will just come in, see that some rats are missing, see the blood and see the bananas that you've BARELY touched and know exactly what you've done.
LISTEN, if that banana isn't legit noshed into, you can kiss that sweet 2nd (3rd?) grade reputation for being a pretty decent human goodbye. People will question everything. Especially neighbor's moms. (Neighbor's moms question everything all the time, and now their rats are missing?)
It's simple: If you wanna eat rats, but not have people know that you ate them, you have to tell a story. A good one. No barely eaten bananas. Which is why I became a copywriter! I love bananas, and by 'bananas,' I mean stories. I prefer to tell true stories because it's easier to sleep at night and I am happy to help brands find those truths. I used to spin bananas as a copywriter / ACD in San Francisco. Now I'm doing it in Portland. If I know you, and I think I don't, this has sold you on wanting to work with me - so head straight to my contact info here.
![Picture](/uploads/6/4/4/3/6443311/2728473.jpg?774)